There’s a common misconception that sex toys are little more than battery-operated boyfriends for the perpetually single. And while you can argue that certain intimacy devices (such as sex dolls) are truly designed for solo play, toy use during partnered sex is quickly becoming the norm. In fact, 61% of customers who responded to a 2021 survey said they were buying sex toys to use with their partner.
The benefits of using sex toys together are well-documented—they can lead to better, stronger orgasms, make sex last longer, and even reduce performance anxiety in the bedroom. That being said, in practice it can be a little daunting. There’s all sorts of spatial logistics to figure out, which can lead to frustrating experiences. Luckily, using toys during sex doesn’t have to feel like a game of Tetris. Check out the best sex positions to try with toys in this guide from FunLove.com.
#1: Doggy Style
One of the most common sex positions is actually also one of the best for playing with sex toys. A major advantage of doggy style is the depth of penetration your partner can achieve. But all too often, the clitoris gets left behind in this position. That’s not to say that your partner can’t reach around and manually stimulate your clit, but it can sometimes be a bit of a stretch, especially when they’re also focused on thrusting (and the nice view).
The good news is that using sex toys in doggy style is easy, and you have a wide variety of toys to pick from, particularly if you’re the receiving partner. This is a great position to break out your favorite vibrator. While bigger toys often get in the way during sex positions like missionary, they work great in doggy style because the receiving partner has much more space to work with.
For those with vaginas, a targeted bullet vibe held in one hand may be all you need. But you can also really ramp up the power with a full-size wand or switch up the sensations with a clitoral suction toy like the We-Vibe Melt.
Doggy style is a great position for those with a penis, too, whether you’re on top or bottom. Those on top can use a cock ring, while the receiving partner can take their orgasm to the next level with a male masturbator or pocket stroker.
Tip: If it’s difficult to support yourself with just one arm, you can also modify this position by lowering yourself onto your elbow. Alternatively, you can stay propped up on both hands and your partner can take care of the rest.
Bottom Line: Doggy style allows you to DIY your own pleasure or let your partner reach around from behind with your favorite toy, making it one of the most versatile sex positions to pair with toys of most sizes and styles.
#2: Missionary
It’s not necessary to contort yourself into a pretzel to find a position that works with sex toys. Although the variety of toys you can use in missionary position may be somewhat limited compared to doggy style, it’s still a viable option for couples who enjoy the intimacy and closeness of this position.
In missionary position, your best bet is to invest in a toy made especially with partners in mind. Couples’ sex toys are all the rage these days, and for good reason. They are often hands-free, wearable devices that provide stimulation for both partners. In this case, you’ll want to look for a couples’ toy on the smaller side.
One excellent option for those with a penis is the Intrigue Romeo Remote-Controlled Cock Ring. This bad boy fits snugly at the base of your penis and is made from silky smooth silicone for comfort and ease. It also comes with a ball strap if you want to crank up the intensity.
Just as importantly, it features a buzzy, flexible clitoral stimulator that isn’t too bulky for missionary sex. The remote control can be used by either partner to increase or decrease the vibration level. You can also use the bullet vibrator separately from the ring—a great choice for foreplay.
If you have a vagina, an insertable sex toy may provide the extra internal and external stimulation you’re looking for. The We-Vibe Unite is a wearable dual-stimulator vibe that targets both the G-spot and the clit. The insertable portion is small but powerful and will stay in place, even when things get slippery. During penetration, the internal portion also stimulates both partners for explosive orgasms.
Tip: If you’re having trouble making this position work, you can try a modified missionary position, in which the receiving partner slides a pillow under their back and bends their legs towards their chest. To make it even more effortless, try using a sex pillow.
Bottom Line: For super-intimate positions like missionary, invest in hands-free, wearable, insertable toys, or those small enough to fit between you, like a bullet vibe.
#3: Spooning
Like doggy style, spooning is very adaptable. It also requires much less effort and is a godsend if you’ve got bad knees. For big spoons with shorter arms, it’s way easier to reach forward or behind in this position, too. Whether you’re having vaginal or anal sex, you can have a lot of fun incorporating toys in this position.
When one partner wants the experience of penetration but the other partner doesn’t have a penis, a strap-on can be the ultimate sex toy. Wearing a strap-on as the big spoon can help keep it in place, especially if you’re using a strapless strap-on. Spooning is also especially great for those new to pegging, as it allows for shallower penetration in a position that encourages muscle relaxation. This position also works really well with G-spot toys, since penetration from this angle puts more pressure on that particular part of the anatomy.
Spooning works for non-penetrative sex, too. The big spoon can reach around with a small handheld vibe like the Dame Pom Flexible Vibrator and stimulate all the little spoon’s erogenous zones with broad vibrations or pinpoint precision.
Bottom Line: Spooning isn’t just for cuddling. It’s a low-effort sex position that allows both partners to maintain the intimacy of full-body contact and rev up the intensity with sex toys.
#4: Cowgirl (and Reverse Cowgirl)
Sometimes, you just gotta ride. Like missionary position, cowgirl allows for maximum eye contact and closeness. But unlike missionary, cowgirl and reverse cowgirl put the receiving partner in total control. Both positions work well with a variety of sex toys–the key is knowing which ones will maximize both partners’ pleasure.
Some people with clitorises may find it easier to achieve orgasm just through the grinding action of cowgirl. But in case you need some extra stimulation, a vibrating cock ring, bullet vibe, or another clitoral stimulator is a great addition to this position. We love the small but mighty Le Wand Double Vibe, a pocket-sized vibe with pinchable bunny ears for targeted stimulation of the clit, nipples, and other erogenous zones. Super rumbly and ergonomically designed, it can be easily held in place by either the top or bottom partner.
If you’re using a strap-on in cowgirl position, you want to opt for one that is going to stay in place while the receiving partner rides, which may mean investing in a secure harness. Alternatively, if you’ve been practicing those kegels, a strapless strap-on like the Strap On Me Vibrating Bendable Strapless Strap On ensures that both partners get a happy ending. If you love your partner’s assets, reverse cowgirl can be a great sex position for this reason, too. This is a great position for trying out new toys like butt plugs or anal beads.
Bottom Line: Cowgirl is a great way to experiment with taking control of you and your partner’s pleasure, without sacrificing intimacy. It also leaves your hands free for plenty of experimentation with toys and accessories like blindfolds and masks.
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